Comedian Kelly Wilson lists 10 ways you know it’s a ‘depression day’
For many people, laughing at depression can feel awkward. As a person diagnosed with depression, post traumatic stress disorder, and anxiety, I can tell you honestly that I would rather you laugh at my jokes about mental illness, especially depression.
Depression is one of the most common and significant health concerns in the United States, affecting as many as ten percent of Americans at any given time. This disorder can be the direct result of high-stress events in our lives, such as the death of a loved one, divorce, and the loss of a job. Depression can also be clinical, meaning that it is an illness that comes and goes in its severity. Clinical depression lurks, appearing unexpectedly and always unwelcome, like toe jam or food poisoning.
As a comedian, I have found that humour can be therapeutic and even a form of self-medication when I find myself in the midst of a depression day. While symptoms of depression – such as changes in appetite, energy levels, and sleep patterns – are well-known, it can be difficult for those dealing with depression to recognise the symptoms as they occur. Instead, I have designed ten ways that anyone can figure out whether or not today is a depression day.
1. It turns out that you actually like country music. When listening to the lyrics of a country song that includes losing a job, the death of a dog, and a cheating spouse, you think, “Now that’s a good life.”
2. You make your own phone cry. There’s so much sad music on your Spotify playlist that your phone leaks real tears and then explodes.
3. A bag of Doritos and a packet of Oreos is a great dinner. You tell yourself, “Hey, there’s 5 grams of protein per serving.”
4. Dry shampoo and deodorant is considered a shower. Also, you try to remember the last time you had a shower that included water…and you can’t.
5. You consider Netflix binge-watching a legitimate sport, and you are a gold medalist.
6. When you sit at a stop sign and wait for the traffic light to change.
7. You’re jealous of how much a sloth gets to sleep (hint: anywhere from 9 to 20 hours a day)
8. You pray for rain so you can stop shaving your legs for a while…or forever. So you wear pants on a 90-degree day, so what?
9. When you see your gynecologist and he suggests that you go on antidepressants, because apparently even your crotch is sad.
10. You head to the Costco website to shop for deals…on caskets. And urns.
Written by Kelly Wilson
